Today MIML™ and I went on a bike ride. Yes, we do that semi-regularly, but today’s was a little different… it was 220km long.

This is where we went:

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And it was superb riding weather! Bit of a breeze and lots of sun! After petrol we went to Port Douglas for a leg stretch, then onto Mount Molloy. Don’t get me wrong, the ride from Cairns to Port is lovely and I never cease to smile coming around the bend at Buchan’s Point seeing the ocean, but the ride up the range was almost perfect- sweeping bends, rainforrest and a lovely road surface. I even managed to get my boot on the road going around one bend! It felt great!

Charley Boorman said the burgers in Mount Molloy were the best in the world and he wasn’t really kidding! They were awesome! Look:

Yes, that is a 50c coin! I daren’t think how many eggs were used or calories consumed!

Back on the bikes to Mareeba where the temptation was to see how fast the bike could go (I got up to 125km/h when overtaking a truck being driven in a lunatic manner!) and then back down to Cairns. Yes the Kuranda Range is a pleasant ride, but nothing compared to Mossman-Mt Molloy. The good thing though was riding late in the afternoon with shadows of the bike on the road and bugs splattering over my helmet visor

Oh and the best bit… Between the two fuel stations I used 8.48l and averaged 26.01 km/l. Yeah, not bad!

The bum is fine, but the back is a little stiff, but that could be due to yesterday’s gym workout too! Next ride is going to be heading south and going Innisfail to Atherton. Might even attempt the Gillies Range…

Anyway, today was the first Saturday in a while where the sun was out and it wasn’t even overcast or threatening rain. So many people like me decided to get their bikes out of the garage and go for a spin. I just span around town a bit- no time to go on a big journey, but it was fun. Except for the idiots on other bikes.

Picture this. The sun is shining, it’s not too hot and lots of people are out and about in their vehicles. I am stopped at a red light in the right hand lane of a two lane road. I am the first vehicle in my lane. I have a ute to my left and a four wheel drive behind me. The light changes colour. I am pretty aggressive taking off from lights, but as soon as I hit the speed limit I stay there. So I am on 60 in the centre of the lane. I hear a Harley coming up on my left. There is no mistaking that sound. Meh, I figure, if that douche wants to speed past me then go for it, at least the sound of his exhaust will go with him! Oh and of course he was in a singlet, shorts and thongs, but that appears to be Harley uniform up here. Even though the road is marked at 60km/h, it seems most people want to do it at 70. Cars are overtaking me in the left hand lane, but I don’t worry. I have every right to observe the speed limit.

Then it happens. I am in the zone. I thought I was aware of vehicles surrounding me, but somehow I missed the most amazingly idiotic excuse for a bike rider I have yet to experience on two wheels. A Kawasaki Ninja overtakes me in the right hand lane! That’s right, in my lane with a planted median strip. Once the shock had died down I noticed the cars around me were being a lot more aggressive. I was the biker doing the right thing- obeying the speed, sitting in the middle of the lane, observing vehicles and pedestrians on either side and yet two of the three bikes that the cars around me had seen had sped off acting like <insert preferred profanity here!> I was the one left to cope with their anger.

No doubt these drivers have gone home complaining that all bikers are just an accident waiting to happen, and road deaths would be halved if bikers weren’t allowed on the streets. But it is not all of us. Unfortunately this afternoon it was 2/3 of us though. And I was the third left to cope with drivers anger. Still, I hope the weather stays like this for a bit as it is still the most exhilarating experience riding on two wheels!

But I still don’t have a bike.

Last August, MIML™s overseas licence expired and when he tried to get a Queensland one he was told he had to sit the tests again. And in Queensland you have to have held a car licence for 12 months before you can have a motorbike licence. Now they were kind and said that MIML™ didn’t need to get his restricted licence first, but he did need to get his car licence. So he got his car licence last August (he has been driving for many years, don’t worry!) But it was only this last week he resat his bike test and passed with flying colours.

So today we went for a ride. I wore my new jacket, gloves and boots (ouch, my toes still hurt!) and we rode to Ellis Beach. A gorgeous sunny day and it was just lovely being back on a bike and snuggled up to my man!

When we arrived at Ellis Beach there were bikes everywhere. There are bike clubs that do regular rides to Port Douglas and it looked like today there was a Harley group. Around 40 bikes, riders and pillions pulled in and out whilst we were there.

And it made me think about what sort of Bikie Mole I want to be…

You see there were types. There were the young skinny ones that looked like they had to wear chunky boots to keep them anchored to the ground and stop them blowing off in the wind like some fish and chip wrapping. There were older skinny types too, mostly in fringed jackets. There were other older ones in tight jeans and t-shirts that emphasised ample bosoms.

The Harley riders were also of different genres, however they had common characteristics– they all wanted to show that their bike was loudest when taking off and moving up the gears.

I suppose I’m not really into leather and the fringed jacket does little for me. Likewise chunky heeled boots. My bosom isn’t that ample and my figure not that suited to anything tight…

So I will stick to being me! Jeans with my Air Flow BWM jacket, DOT helmet, black gloves and boots that will stretch a little and make more room for my toes!

And I won’t be an accessory for much longer. When we get back from our trip I am looking in earnest for a used 250cc bike. MIML™ and I can ride together. Well most of the time, because it is still awfully nice sitting on the back snuggling up to him as we cruise down the highway!

For a while (even before I met MIML™) I have thought about getting my motorbike license. I have never been into the whole leathers and tattoo scene and can’t see myself joining the Hells Angels or Rebels or even owning a Harley, but it is something that has intrigued me. 

My father had his motorbike license. I think there is a photo of my brother or I sitting on his bike as a pre-schooler. I wouldn’t have been that old because I remember Dad getting rid of the bike after one accident too many. He had broken his collarbone this time and the bike was dispatched before he did any more serious damage.

I remember as a teenager learning of the death of the son of family friends who had been riding pillion, but without protective clothing.

I don’t see myself as a risk taker. I have had some periods in my life where I have undertaken some behaviour that could be seen as risky, but I have never yearned to jump from a plane or bungee, or see how fast my car will actually go on an open stretch of road. I even steered clear of the drug scene at college and could count on one hand, with fingers left over, the number of cigarettes I have smoked.

Yet riding a bike has always had an appeal. I rode one once on a farm as a teenager and remember getting up to second gear. I still remember the buzz riding down a dirt driveway.

When I first rode pillion with MIML™ I just fell in love with the experience. Feeling the wind rushing around you. Experiencing the smells, hearing the revs of the engine and knowing how close you are to the road is a thrill.

So I decided to look into getting my bike license. Queensland has the some of the slackest rules in the country. To get your learners you need to answer 5 multiple choice questions, that even if you haven’t read the manuals or visited Queensland Transport’s website are pretty easy. Actually they are the same as on the trial questions on the website. 

Then you have two options. You can hold your learners for six months and then take a test with Queensland Transport, or you can do a QRide course. Most QRide courses go for two days and once you have finished these two days you get a certificate which states you are competent enough to get your RE or restricted license and can ride a bike up to 250cc engine capacity.

So I turned up yesterday morning for the course. I got through yesterday without too much hassle. I found the slow figure of eight work a challenge, but was getting the hang of it by the end of the day. Then last night I developed a migraine. Well it was either that or heatstroke, or low blood sugar or something but it involved a headache, nausea and feeling generally blah. So I had an early night and felt a lot better this morning.

I passed the slow riding competencies this morning. I could travel 5 meters in 11 seconds or whatever the requirement was and I managed the figure of 8 4 times in a row without stalling, hitting cones, putting my foot down or losing control.

Then we had the emergency stops which I did really well. We did swerving and slaleming (using counterbalance techniques) which I got after a few attempts. Breezed through the theory.

After lunch we had a simulated road set up on the driving range. I got through it, but it was challenging. Then we hit the road. I had a fluro yellow vest with a big L on the back and the three of us (instructor and the other course participant) set out. I totally misjudged the first roundabout and it is a miracle I did not come off the bike. I went up over the kerb, over a drain, down the other side and back onto the road. Thank ceiling cat there was no oncoming traffic or cars behind me. The instructor was out in front and the other course participant behind me was far enough back to avoid me. I could not stop so carried on, but was shaken.

We road a circuit around Yorkeys Knob. I kept forgetting to turn off my indicators. Then I misjudged the same corner a few times. I was told I had one more chance. And I blew it. By this stage I was totally shaken and was amazed I hadn’t gotten myself seriously injured or killed. I felt like a failure. And I had to ride back again. My braking was all over the place, time after time I forgot to cancel my indicators and I misjudged simple bends. 

I get to go back for another day but it is still very scary. The instructor assured me that he thought I would be able to do it after one more day and he recognised that I freaked out, but also said that if I freaked out riding next weekend by myself I could seriously injure myself or even kill myself.

I admitted that I felt too scared to go out on the road by myself so the extra day will be good, but I am already wondering what if that isn’t enough. 

My parents (wisely) insisted I take riving lessons before I got my car license. I probably would have had 10-15 lessons (probably more) over a six to nine month period. Expecting to get a bike license in a weekend is a big ask I suppose, but plenty of people do it.

I know I am not ready to be let loose on the roads, yet it still hurts to discover this. I suppose I want instant mastery, in the same way I want my thesis to be instantly written. I know I am putting it off for fear of failing it. I know I need to get it finished. I know I will get a better job once I have finished it. I just need to know I can do it. Just as I will be able to ride a bike.

Perhaps one of the first quotations I found in my search this evening is the most apt:

The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure. (Sven Goran Eriksson)