OK. It is Mother’s Day and I will admit it- there are times when I hate being a mother.

Whoa! I know it is not that PC to actually admit it, but being a mother sucks. Well not all the time. The love and hugs and kisses and seeing your young ones accomplish things is awesome, but there are not so nice bits too.

And I am not taking dirty nappies or toilet training or being woken up at all hours of the night. Or even pre-pubescent attitudes from 11 year old girls. I am talking responsibility.

I grew up in a pretty strict household. There were rules and these were black and white. This was not necessarily a bad thing as long as you didn’t try and question things. What was said was the rules and there was hardly ever any movement. In many ways this was a pretty sheltered environment too. Whilst I was being protected from the evils of the world, I didn’t necessarily know they were there and what harm they could do, if any.

This has shaped me as a parent. I try and talk things through with my kids-

• What do you think might happen if I let you stay home all day by yourself?
• What might happen if I leave you at the shopping centre for 4 hours with your friends?
• Why does Mum have access to my chat logs on MSN? (I have never read them, but it is know that I can)
• Why can’t I put a photo of myself or my surname up on my MSN profile?
• Why doesn’t Mum pay the cleaners to tidy my room and not just clean it?

But not all parents are on the same page. Some of Miss 11s friends spend all day home alone in the holidays. Some wander shopping centres for hours on end. Some put all manner of stuff online. At least Miss 11 now knows what happens when she lets the cleaners in her room and she hasn’t tidied- no I am not going to ring and ask where your XYZ is!

But my greatest challenge is TV and movie viewing. And that is not just with Miss 11. Mr 8 argues about it too. You see, I won’t let my kids watch M rated movies or television programmes. That is a rule and they know that. And they argue it. And it is damn hard! Mr 8 has watched the first Indiana Jones movie over and over again. But the rest are rated M. And I have seen them and probably there is not a lot in there that is inappropriate for him, but the office of film and literature classification has deemed that they have an M rating.

This means:

The M category is recommended for mature audiences. A mature perspective is required to view this material. The impact of the content is moderate.

Mr 8 has friends who last year were taken to see the latest Indiana Jones movie, Batman and IronMan. He has friends who have been to Star Trek and numerous other films and they talk about it.

It is not helped that originally, many of these cartoons were aimed at kids and they are merchandised to young kids.

I saw Star Trek on Friday night and was blown away by it. It is the best film I have seen in ages. And I know that the Dr Who crazed Mr 8 would also be blown away by it. But it has an M rating. I’ve seen it and there are part of it that are a little scary maybe, but there is no more violence than you would see in any cartoon. There is no overtly sexual content and it is a fun movie. But I fear that by allowing him to see this film, it would open the floodgates. Miss 11 is definitely mature enough to see it in my eyes, but I can’t really take her and not him.

So I find myself being black and white. M rating, nope you can’t see it yet.

Yes there is violence on telly especially in cartoons, however the animation helps the fantasy aspect of the programme/film.

Mr 8 and I went and saw Dragonball during the week whilst Miss 11 was on camp. I thought it was a crap film, but Mr 8 enjoyed it. Except for the mushy bits. A friend told me her 9yo daughter saw Race to Witch Mountain and thought it was really scary. Yet both of these have PG ratings. And there are some adult films that are rated PG- 27 Dresses comes to mind. Not that appropriate for an 11yo, but nothing overtly wrong with it either.

I am not sure when I will change my views. Perhaps we do need to look at censorship and divide the PG category so that we can recognise that parental guidance means different things for 5 year olds compared to 12/13 year olds.

Whatever the answer I will remain the mean mother, the one who says no to her kids and wants them to stay young for as long as possible. Perhaps I am turning into my parents. But there is such a fine line and as a mother this is one of my hardest responsibilities and dilemmas. And it sucks.

(Edit: Thanks pixel8ted for pointing out the errors- I have found a few spelling/typing booboos which I have changed. My brain is pretty fuzzy from the meds I’m on at present, please forgive my other errors everyone!)