“Last night, Mummy picked us up and we went and chose gin and tonic and spent ages working out which weed was the best to get.”
We are pet owners again. Imogen wants a cat, Jasper wants a dog and I told them we could settle for goldfish! MIML™ has two pet rats that are rather sweet in their ratty kind of way! Actually sitting there looking at them is very calming. 2 months ago if anyone had told me I would be in the same room as two rats, let alone holding them and letting them crawl on my shoulders I would have sent them for a psych consult, now I am having the psych consult as I play with rats
But back to Gin and Tonic! We have had the bowl for ages and used to have fish, especially in the old house. I was trying to remember all their names. The ones that lived the longest (we are talking months here!) were Dory and Marlin. I am not sure how long these two will last, but still if Gin dies, we can get Vodka and have Vodka and Tonic. If Tonic dies we can get Vermouth and just have a martini. Of course Imogen wants two new ones called Fish and Chips.
Oh and the snail, well he is called Jean-Claude. I did suggest Citron to go with the Gin and Tonic, but no, the kids decided on Jean-Claude. For dinner tonight we went to Sushi Train and I told the kids that if one of the fish died we could turn it into sushi. Jasper quickly pointed out that if it died it would be sick and would make us sick. The logic of a 7 year old. The weed was hard to choose. In the end we went for some young stuff that will sit in the bowl. As long as Gin and Tonic like it I suppose.
So here they are! Now bear in mind, I think Imogen and Jasper have differing views as to which one is Gin and which is Tonic, but meh!
I so wanted to include this xkcd in here, but it won’t fit in my layout and looks crap! It needs to be shared! So in the immortal words of Molly Meldrum “Do yourselves a favour…”
This is floating in my head, so it might as well be floating in yours as you read on…
My family has always had weird names for some foods. Growing up, ice-cream was always ‘ICDC’ and tomato sauce the very Australian ‘Dead ‘Orse.’ My kids have developed their own food-isms- bean sprouts are known as ‘has beens.’
During the week, I saw someone at work eating caramel slice- you know the one, biscuit base, condensed milk caramel in the middle and chocolate on top. I have been thinking of it ever since and as I got into a cooking mode today decided to bake it.
Now the recipe I used is from Nigella’s How to be a Domestic Goddess. It is called ‘Roxanne’s Millionaire’s Shortbread.’ Now we always called it Caramel Slice when I was growing up, but after sampling it just now, I can see the millionaire bit comes from the richness! Immy said that it will last at least a week in the fridge. I suspect I will be freezing some. Now that is not to say it is not divine, for it is, but the tiniest of squares is enough really to round off a pleasant meal, or serve with a cup of tea,
The novel thing about this recipe is that the caramel filling is cooked in the microwave. I cooked it as Immy was watching a programme on microwaves being unsafe and leaking all sorts of nasties. Meh! They did say if there was something in there it was fine.
So the recipe:
Roxanne’s Millionaire’s Shortbread
This is the recipe, given to me by a fellow-mother at my daughter’s school, that introduced me to the notion of melting chocolate in the microwave. I am now a complete convert: it is truly the best way to do it. And you make the caramel in the microwave, too, so that what would normally take a good couple of hours takes only a few minutes. Another revelation. It’s not that I never used a microwave before, but I hadn’t ever realized it could do things better as opposed to just faster.
You can make this a good week in advance if you’d like. Keep the shortbread in a cold place or in an airtight tin, and it’ll be fine. Or you can even freeze it for up to 6 months. If frozen, the squares should be allowed to defrost for 3-4 hours at room temperature.
1 x 23 cm square brownie tin or similar, greased and the bottom lined
Preheat the oven to 170 degrees Celsuis/gas mark 3.
Put the flour and sugar into a bowl and rub in 175g of the butter, clumping the dough together to form a ball. Press this sandy shortbread mixture into the tin and smooth it either with you hands or a spatula. Prick it with a fork and cook for 5 minutes, then lower the oven to 150 degrees Celsius/gas mark 2, and cook it for a further 30-40 minutes until it is pale golden and no longer doughy. Let it cool in the tin.
Melt the remaining 200g of butter in the microwave (in a large microwavable bowl) for 2-3 minutes, then add the condensed milk and golden syrup. Whisk the mixture well until the butter is thoroughly incorporated. Heat for 6-7 minutes until it is boiling, stirring thoroughly every minute. As a microwave novice, I found this bit difficult and had to watch that I didn’t burn the toffee mixture (I did once), which is why I caution you to check and stir every minute. It’s ready when it’s thickened and turned a light golden brown. Pour this molten toffee evenly over the cooled shortbread and leave it to set.
Break the chocolate into pieces and melt it in a bowl in a microwave. Pour and spread evenly over the fudge mixture (the less you touch it, the shinier it will be) and leave it to cool. Once set, cut the caramel shortbread into pieces. The squares can be stored in the fridge to keep them firm, though if it’s winter that shouldn’t be necessary.
Makes about 24. (Well I’ve cut 30 and will be cutting each of those in half in future!)
And the finished product:
Yes, it hadn’t quite set, but hey, I’m blaming the heat up here (have I mentioned how cold it is lately?) but oh my! I keep referring to it as Call Girl Slice in my head, but don’t fancy explaining that to the kids!
I will admit to frequenting Gloria Jean’s from time to time. I have read about the support of the Mercy Mission and the philosophy and ethos of the Mercy Mission and the like, but still enjoy a Crême Brulée chiller every so often or a latte or a Chai.
This morning, on my way to my waxing appointment I stopped off for a Chai. They were relatively busy. When my name was called, there were marshmallows floating in my drink.
“Um, er, you did call Fiona?”
“Sure did, enjoy your drink!”
“Um, but I ordered a Chai…”
“Oh, I am sorry.” Then she yelled “Can we please have a large Chai on Skim, NOW!”
So I go back to waiting and a very skinny lady sidles up to me.
“You know you shouldn’t drink Chai when you are pregnant. There are all sorts of spices in it that cause miscarriage.”
“Really?” I said, “I’ll keep that in mind if ever I find myself pregnant.”
“Oh, sorry, I’m limiting myself to one cup of real coffee a day and having decaf for the rest of the time, don’t think the little coffee bean inside will complain then.” And she patted her very very slender tummy.
Now Bec Cartright-Hewitt-Home-and-Away-Tennis-Wife-and-Mother-Extraordinaire looks more pregnant on the front of a woman’s magazine this week than this lady. And no, I didn’t buy the magazine, I saw it as I queued to pay for my groceries last night. Next to the one that proclaimed she’s sacrificing more motherhood for her husband. Whatever!
So a few points to ponder… I googled ‘Chai tea safe pregnancy’ and was hit with a number of Yahoo! Answers pages. Knowing some of the people who frequent those pages (Hi @andrewsayer and @yonderboy!) I decided that perhaps it wouldn’t offer the most accurate information. I did find this which is somewhat interesting and looks semi-reputable, and this which basically says that green tea helps prevent folic acid absorption which in turn leads to birth defects, although they try and say that it is the green tea causing birth defects. Sigh! Medical science at its best.
So as I sit at my desk, barefoot, but not pregnant (Hi Mum again!) I remember my early days of pregnancy. Of course I was a food and drink nazi and didn’t touch any caffeine (some people reading this will remember trying to work out how much caffeine is in milo- Hi Suzie!) I don’t think I ever stood in a coffee shop though and proselytised about the negative effects of tea with spices. Especially to someone who may look mildly pregnant, but is in fact, just overweight! Oh and somewhere there is irony about pro-life and stuff, but I’ll let you find it for yourself as the link between Chai and miscarriage is pretty tenuous.
Hi Mum! I figured you’d found me here since you found me on Plaxo on Sunday and I had one referral here from there! Pour a gin and enjoy! Not a lot here you don’t know already… I think
Oh and the sign comes from my new waxer- did I tell you I am going elsewhere for depilation these days?
(And to everyone else, please excuse me! Normal programming will resume shortly!)
We have a guest staying from New Zealand this week whilst he attends a conference. Yesterday, we took advantage of Jasper playing footy at Trinity Beach to visit the beach for a paddle. The stinger nets are still out so even paddling was a little risky, but the water was warmish and the kids had fun.
I&J (the fish fingers as I dub them) have their moments, as do any sister and brother, but on the whole get along well. I do wonder however, if this photo could be captioned with them ganging up on their mother (I’ll hold her hand and you tickle her until she falls over in the water) or Imogen telling Jasper furfies (Yeah and see the sharks swim right up here…) or just a bit of bonding. I know which one I’ll go with!
Had a gorgeous date Friday night with the MIML™ (man in my life.) We had dinner at Verdi’s. Possibly the nicest pizza I have had in long time. Of course the company was superb too. Now we went for pizza, but couldn’t pass up dessert. Yes, we may have the emotional intelligence of a pair of teenagers, but when the specials board is written up with “Brandy Snaps filled with cream and masterated strawberries” curiosity got the better of us. I couldn’t bring myself to ask the waiter what the chef had done to masterate the strawberries, but the MIML™ has a brilliant poker face and was able to make quips that brought tears to my eyes and made the couple at the table near us giggle too.
We joked to each other that if they came out as phallic things with cream oozing out… thinking that they would actually be baskets. But no. This is what I was greeted with:
Yes, the jokes kept coming. And yes, I know it is macerated! But hey. We have dirty minds!
We never ‘did’ Mother’s Day as a child. My father’s line was ‘Every day is Mother’s Day.’ We never did Father’s Day either.
For the 5 years I spent battling infertility I avoided Mother’s Day like the plague. Told myself it was over commercial.
Then I became a mother. My mum sent me flowers the first year and has most years since. When the kids started school they were given money (usually by me!) for the Mother’s Day Stall and I have received some beautiful things over the years. Today is no exception- a smelly tea light candle in a mirror backed holder with flowers on it and a teddy holding a heart upside down. I got a text from my Mum who is overseas. Immy made Banana Buttermilk pancakes for lunch (Japs had footy at 8.30 so breakfast was out of the question!) and the kids perhaps argued less.
I am back in electrical at work and have had lots of people in buyng gifts for mum. If I am ever given an epilator or an iron for Mother’s Day I think I will hit you over the head with the said item. Yes, it is commercial, but it is nice to be remembered as a mum. Isildae summed it up well. I have been so well supported by the ‘motherhood network’ for the last 11 Mother’s Days.
But still, part of me is sad on Mother’s Day. Sad for those yearning to be mothers or fathers or grandparents even. Infertility sucks big time. Commercialising days and putting motherhood on a pedestal is hard to cope with when it is something you are trying to achieve.
So to Imogen and Jasper, I love you so much and am glad you have made me a mother. I know I am trying and at times am a crap mother. I think Jasper summed it up well this evening: “Mummy, I know you love me even when you yell at me.” Out of the mouths of babes!
Puns galore, yes! Have just bulk moderated 68 spam comments from the last few days. Most either offering online poker of ringtones. Oh and one from ‘Increase your girth and make her smile’ who liked my feminist rant on women’s day. Yeah… whatever!
Oh and you know how much I love elephants? Well I found this…
Fiona | 
05 29th, 2008| 
